The Journal Entries

It had been a strange night already, but I don't know what possessed me then. I walked briskly out of the castle and took a grav-slide down to the lagoon, I remember, and then summoned the SDisk. When the symbols on the command panel resolved into the word "destination" I ordered "Underground." The pad resolved into the glimmering white pentacle that manifests in water environments, and I stepped across the water onto the center. Since I was the only passenger, I immediately said "go." But also, in the back of my mind, there was the question, and as the teleporter activated, the desperate question came through clearly:

"What am I doing...

---

...here?" The smell hit me first, but then it always hits first. Strong, pungent masculine sweat of a dozen species and leather combined with other, less definable (or more deniable) smells. The heat hits second. Rick uses full radiation-divestiture cooling units, and it doesn't help. The raw incandescent lightbulbs, the bodies and motion of what was probably over a hundred males moving in rhythm to music that was too damned loud, added to the heat that soaked through me where my skin was exposed. My face was flushed, and I knew it. What am I doing here?

I walked forward into the dark and shadows and approached the bar. Horny, yes, but looking for something, too. But what? A specific species? A certain size? A master for a night, the weekend? What am I doing here?

There was a time when doing this-- engaging in random, violent, wild sex with whatever mel struck my fancy-- was the high point of my every day. But I eventually grew tired of it, because something was missing, something I get out of my love for P'nyssa. And when the need for the violence, for the intense sensory overload, for the simple pleasure that cleansing pain can be, gets to be too much, I go to people I know, people I trust to handle me right. Once again I wondered, What am I doing here?

I walked up to the bar and ordered something mild and simple. The bartender, a Felinzi, gave me this furrowed-brow look, his ears pulling forward, but I ignored it. Whatever I was looking for, it didn't take long for that something to find me. I stood with my back to most of the bar when this enormous grey-furred paw clamped itself over my eyes. I struggled for a second when this low, barely controlled Uncia voice, full of menace, growled "don't fight, and don't talk. I have orders not to hurt you too badly. I know who you are, and I know you speak Uncia." I stopped. I don't fight with two-and-a-half meters and two hundred kilos of anthropomorphic snow leopard, not without powered armor I don't, but I wanted to. His huge paw firmly over my eyes, the tips of his claws imbedded just to the point of pain against my right temple, he turned me around and directed me. The claws of his other paw were pressed through the leather vest I wore, and he pushed me on. Not for the first time I wondered, What am I doing here?

The music of The Underground faded into the background, and I realized he was leading me back towards the private rooms. There was the sound of door opening, and he pushed me through it into a room that felt small. Oh Gods, did he take me back to the dungeon? More hands were suddenly on me, and three more mels, as far as I could tell, began removing my pants, my boots, my shirt and vest. I struggled again, and there was a sharp slap across my ass. I groaned. There was more noise, the sound of chains, and leather straps were wrapped around my wrists, my arms right above the elbow, my ankles and above the knees, and around my throat. The claw at my back moved to my shoulder, and began to force me down. I whimpered as I was forced into a kneeling position. I was pushed down onto a leather platform, and I heard chains rattle as I realized I was being strapped into a suspended harness. I tried to get up, but hands grabbed me and pushed me back down, securing my belted neck to a variform headrest that provided for easy access to my mouth. My wrists were crossed and secured behind my back.

More hands grabbed my legs and spread them wide. I heard more chains as I was firmly secured to the floor by the ankles and knees. The Uncia never took his paw from my eyes. A final leather belt was lain across the small of my back and tightly secured to the harness. The hands left me, and then the Uncia's paw left as well. The lights were off! I still couldn't see a damn thing. I heard the shuffling of feet as I heard my four assailants leave, and when they opened the door the little light admitted let me see only a featureless grey wall.

I don't know how long I sat there in the dark, waiting. I strained, fighting against the leather, fighting with my fear. I stopped occasionally, and tried to sort out the scent of my four assailants, looking for anything familiar. Nothing. This room was obviously well used, the harness imbedded with sweat. I waited, struggling.

The door behind me opened. A bolt of fear shot through me. For the first time I realized just how vulnerable I was, my ass spread wide and exposed, my cock hanging free and accessible. There were footsteps, and a low chuckling growl. I heard the door click shut. The smell of my new master washed over me, leather and sweat, and I knew what he was. Mephit. All the facts about Mephits ran through my mind. Averaging 175 cm and a little lighter than humans. Black fur, erectile tail-- anthropomorph skunk. And this one, I knew him, but where? His scent was oh, so familiar! Dammit, I knew this melMeph!

There was another chuckle, and I jumped as I felt sharp claws lightly touch my buttocks. He laughed, a cruel laugh that told me nothing. The claws tracked across my ass and up the small of my back, one of the most ticklish parts of my body, sending shocks through me that rattled the chains of my leather prison. And then there was a voice, and he said "Hello, Shardik."

I groaned. I knew him. Oh, yes, I did, and I was going to pay dearly for that knowledge. "Hello..." I whispered, gulped, "Hello, Aaden."

He walked around to stand in front of me, and then crouched down so we were nearly face-to-face. "Remember the last time we met?" he asked.

My tongue was thick, but I managed to say, "In the Hex."

"Remember what happened that day?" He was grinning, evil.

I nodded, then found my balls to say, "You lost."

He reacted like I'd hit him, pulling his arm back to slap me, but didn't. He grinned again, maliciously, and said "You won. You were the first person to beat me, to actually take me all the way to the bell, you bastard. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT COST ME?"

I nodded, echoing his grin as I did so. Tied up as I was, helpless as I was, I had him. I had beat him in the Hex, and his first loss had unseated his legend. I'd fucked him there in the center, in front of the roaring crowd, raping him as he'd have done to me had he won. He could be beat, and I had proven it. He was still one of the best, but he was beatable.

"Well, guess what, Shardik... Tonight you get yours. Me and my four friends are going teach you what it means to win. And you're not going to see it." He reached back behind the chaps he wore, took out a leather blindfold, and approached me. I whipped my head back and forth to avoid his hands, but he snapped his fingers and the door opened. "I'm not going to argue with you on this." The Uncia's huge paws clamped down on my head and held me still. The blindfold went on.

"Dammit, Aaden, let me see!"

"Oh, no, not on your life," he replied. I felt the Uncia let go of me, and I was left to hang there, blind. There was silence again.

And then I heard the sound of clothing being removed, and of heavy groans of male approval. The smell of sex was strong again, and my cock responded, becoming erect even as it dangled freely. There was a small laugh, then a paw touched my face, wrapping over it and then under my chin. The fingers, Aaden's by the scent, pressed into my jaw, and he said, "Open it." I resisted. He squeezed harder until my jaw ached, and repeated "Open it. Now."

I opened my mouth, waiting. I could feel him approaching, smell his crotch, the familiar sweet smell, and I felt the head of his cock play over my lips. I pursed my lips to kiss him, and he pulled away. "See," he said. "You want it."

I did. I waited as he played with my blindness, slapping my cheeks gently with his cock, teasing. He would pull away, then slowly slide the head of his cock against my cheek or up my chin. "Bastard," I gasped.

"Ahh, you're too anxious. You don't think I could give this to you so easily, do you? You have to suffer."

He pressed the head against my lips, and I opened my mouth to let him. He was huge, described at the Hex if I recall as "two soda cans place one atop the other." Maybe not, but it was close. The head slid past my lips, and I couldn't help but scrape teeth along it, he was so damn large. My tongue was pressed flat against the floor of my mouth, but I did my best, drawing my lips around his cock, feeling the velvet soft head and the slight ridge that ran the underside. I concentrated on his cock, trying to please him.

I felt his hand reach up under the hair on the back of my neck and clamp down on a handful. I groaned, possessed. Damnit, who had told him that? Grab my hair properly like that and I'll do anything. He slowly began to rock back and forth, his enormous maleness fucking my mouth. I heard some sounds, maybe talking, but it didn't concern me. Until I felt the results.

He stroked slowly, always just barely striking the back of my throat, and my reflex had tears streaming down my eyes. I wanted him, wanted him to come, please.

I felt a slight caress against my ass and the pleasure drove me berserk, straining against the bonds, the chains. Aaden's cock in my mouth was going no faster, no more demanding. It was going to take forever, and I wanted it now! The touch was a mitten, somewhere my dim brain registered one of Aaden's four friends as a Tindal. One spoke to another, and I understood the language, but I didn't try to comprehend it. The cock, Aaden's cock, was all that concerned me. That and the soft mitt at my backside.

The mitt went away, and it returned, sharply, slapping my ass. The stinging pain made me try and cry out, but Aaden's cock muffled my scream. Again, and again. "Don't bite," Aaden chided me. "I might have to get rough."

Damn you, damn you, the words shot through my mind. Get rough, then. Just don't tease me like this.

The slaps stopped, and they hadn't been hard enough to leave much more than a mild sting. Tindal's don't have mush strength as it is. I could feel sometimes a soft coolness under my chin when a tear fell off of me, and sometimes one left a cool track down my throat. There was a soft warm breath over my ass, and then somebody pressed their lips to my buttocks. I groaned again. The lips kissed me gently. Dammit, who was he? I held perfectly still, not wanting to discourage those lips. I concentrated on Aaden's cock, but the lips approached my anus, slowly, and then whoever it was pressed a single kiss to my asshole. My mind reeled. Please, oh please.

It went away, and as it did I felt Aaden's cock pull away as well. I cried out, incoherent with need.

There was a shuffling, and the slight draft told me Aaden had left me, gone back to be with his buddies. There were more moans, more malesex sounds, wet and teasing. My heart beat hard, and I cursed quietly. I felt someone soft and furry crawl under me, and I felt something... a pillow, be passed underneath me as well. A hand, no, a mitten, passed over my cock, and I groaned, louder than ever. Slowly, whoever it was breathed on my cock, and I jumped. Soft lips encircled the head, and slowly the Tindal underneath me began to suck me, as slowly as Aaden had forced me to suck him. He was good. So good, and so slow. There was a hand on my back, moving up to my head, and like Aaden's, this paw reached up under my hair and grabbed me. I groaned. Too much, too much. I recognized the touch of my Uncia kidnaper. He came around, and again in Uncia said, "You get mine." I felt the head of his cock against my lips, and I grabbed it with my mouth, wanting more. It was soft, but my greedy sucking would quickly change that. The Uncia moaned appreciatively. I worked on it with more care, trying to concentrate, trying to ignore the torture of the mouth around my penis.

A hand again reached out to caress my ass, and I heard a thump as someone dropped to his knees on the wooden floor. There was a shuffling, and I felt the soft fur of Aaden's thighs against mine, and his soft cock pressed gently down the crease of my ass, the head dangling against my balls. The mouth around my cock never ceased.

Aaden leaned back, and from what I could hear, someone back there was stroking him to hardness. No, Aaden, I begged silently. Someone else first, you're too big. Let someone else break me in first, please. It's been too long!

But all I could do was moan around my Uncia lover's cock. It was of average thickness, but it was long, and he used it to his best advantage, shoving it past my throat, ravishing me, gagging me over and over, eliciting more tears as he buried his cock into me, and I felt the heavy fur and powerful muscles of his belly against my face when he did. Then he pulled back to let me breathe before starting again.

Aaden rose, and I felt two fingers spreading a lubricant around my anus. It was hot; someone had cared enough to warm it before use. The hand again vanished, and I felt Aaden rise. The Uncia stopped for a moment, and said "You're gonna get it now."

I heard Aaden reply "Yes he is." I felt the head of his cock against my asshole, and behind it I could feel his whole body pressing. He was as hard as steel and as demanding as fire. My anus gave way a little, and the head pressed past the first ring of muscle towards the second ring, the involuntary ring. My ass would give no further, but Aaden just held there, waiting, and he said quietly, "You're going to take me." He pressed again, and I gave way just a little more. The mouth around my cock had stopped, I hadn't noticed when. Slowly, there was a burning sensation around my asshole, a stretching, tearing feeling that hurt so much and was so wonderfully familiar again after all these years. Aaden pressed a little harder, and suddenly I felt my asshole clamp down around him as the entire head of his cock slid into me. I groaned in pain, and in pleasure. Oh, yes.

His hands grabbed my hips and he pressed further, his cock probing deeper into me, sliding into my rectum, and I felt the ancient cramping sensation as he pressed up against my insides, leading deeper into my guts. He had me, pinned like a butterfly, violated. I strained against my bonds to meet him, and he responded, pulling out until the head was left, and then sliding into me, gently. He was slow and sure and he hurt and he felt so good. The Uncia's paw tightened against my hair, and he began to fuck my mouth, again, and I responded, hungry again. The Tindal sucked on me, teasing me torturously, but Aaden set the pace of it all, as he slowly fucked my yielded ass. The tenor of my begging changed, and I honestly hoped one of them was a telepath. Rape me. Please, use me, let me be your toy, your fuck toy, your favorite toy. Use me forever.

Aaden began to fuck me faster, and I could feel the ring of my anus following his cock in and out, and his fucking became harder. Then he stopped, and I felt a shuffling as he placed his knees up closer to mine, and as he stroked into me his thighs struck mine, his hips striking my buttocks, small ripples through our muscular bodies as he slammed me, fucking me, his enormous hard cock taking me, ravaging my ass. The Uncia was forced to accept the pace with every hard shove, and he began to fuck me in earnest. I could feel his orgasm approaching, and he forced it deeper into me. There was no warning, though, when he came, shooting his thick cream down my throat, but his roar filled my ears, my mind, for a moment blocking out even Aaden's eternal cock filling my backside.

The mouth around my cock had eased, backing off, and I wanted to come then, but finally it went away completely. Damn you, I thought again, Please. Vile epithets filled my mind as Aaden filled my asshole with his penis. Damn you.

Aaden began slamming me so hard that the entire harness shifted, and I heard his teeth grind and he said "I'm gonna come," and with three painfully hard jabs deep into my belly he screamed and came, and I actually could feel his come filling me, heating and burning and so wonderful. He collapsed, leaving me still on edge.

The other two men in the room hadn't said a word the entire time, but I heard Aaden address them, saying, "Your turn." There was a small laugh, and Aaden rose from his position behind me. He was replaced by another pair of thighs, and another cock was slid into me. The sudden change burned worse than ever, but I didn't care. A cock was presented to my lips, and I sucked on it rapturously. These two fucked me hard front and rear, and the one in front was very definitely human, the one behind me I guessed to be another Mephit. They used me as effectively as Aaden and the Uncia, and when they came Aaden and the Uncia took their places, this time the Uncia taking my ass and Aaden forcing my mouth against his anus to lick and rim him before turning and filling my mouth with his creamy white come. All the time the Tindal on the floor kept sucking me, taking me to the edge and then backing off. Again the other two took me, and the cock down my throat was definitely Mephitis, and they ravished me as surely as they could.

Then they all backed off, and the mouth around my cock was stronger and more insistent. I felt Aaden get behind, and he slowly slid into me. He cock filled me again as it had before, like no other cock had tonight, and he fucked me slowly and firmly, and I cursed and blessed him as the Tindal underneath me sucked firmly, his mitten coming up and slowly stroking my balls and sometimes past them to touch my asshole as Aaden's cock sawed in and out of me. I was in heaven, and I could feel the pain of denial fading, my orgasm coming, coming. Aaden began to shove harder, and he was going to come one last time, the third time, and suddenly it felt like my balls squeezed down on their own, and everything stopped, and I came, crashing down in an orgasm so long and so loud that they must have heard me back in the main room, my every muscle straining. Aaden screamed aloud too, and the throbbing of his cock back inside me was a final baptism for me. I collapsed.

When I came to, I was loose. They were gone. I rose, aching in every muscle, from every demand. My anus hurt like it had never hurt before, my jaw tired, my cock sore from what must have been two hours of erection. When I finally did try and stand, my mind reeled. I braced myself against the wall. The room was actually smaller than I had even thought at first. I noted a few things, like the small package of wipes on the floor, mostly used. Thank you, Aaden, for being at least that concerned about my health that you would clean yourselves before taking my mouth again. The other thing was the little yellow sheet on the door. "We're in the Arc dining room. Come find us if you awake before 1800 hrs."

I dressed, noting the five claw holes in the vest. They weren't bad. I was going to keep them.

I left to find my abusers. It was well before 1800. I imagine I wobbled a little as I walked. The thought made me smile. But I hurt.

It was a good hurt.

---

EPILOGUE:

Walking through the bar had been difficult, trying to face all those horny males, but I reached the SDisk and ordered it to take me to my own room. I showered, dressed and took a public disk to the Arc dining room.

When I got there, the sun was shining through the enormous skylight, and the plants that lined the metalwork ceiling were green and lush. I scanned the white-washed room for Aaden, and I found him, complete with his four compatriots, and got the shock of my life.

There was a general loud greeting, a lot of "Hey, how ya feelin's," and there, sitting between Aaden and the Uncia, sat P'nyssa. I sat down at the table uncomfortably, shifting, and said, rather shyly "Hi. Guess I'll be doing that for a couple of days."

Aaden raised his eyebrows and said "Guess you will. Well?"

"Well what?" I asked.

"Did you like it?"

I stopped, gaped, and said "Of course I liked it. But... How..."

"P'nyssa?" Aaden asked, both to finish my question and to prompt P'nyssa to answer it.

She said, "We had this planned months ago. We were just waiting for you to show up."

"You what?"

Well, you told me a while ago that that was a fantasy of yours, to be willfully raped by several men."

"So you... and he..." I was stunned. "But I must have told you that years ago!"

She nodded. "So?"

I sighed. "Thank you, P'nyssa." I rose, walked over to her and hugged her over the chair. "I love you."

"I love you too," she said.

"How did you know to get Aaden?" I asked, still stunned.

She smiled that coy smile that always drives me crazy. "That was the hard part. But I did some research." She reached under the table and pulled out a memory chip, plugged it into a small HoloMan she carried, and Kathy Hawkwind's picture illustrated fine, and began to relate the story I'd told her.

"Sonuvabitch," was all I said.

Aaden introduced me to the other three, the Human being a huge blond man named Derek, the Uncia was named Tarritt and the other Mephit, named Erith. I hugged every one of them, but when I stopped at Erith I said "Young melMeph, have you got something against me?"

He looked flustered, and said, "No... why?"

"Because you fucked me hard, real hard. Harder than Aaden, even."

"No, I don't think I do. I thought you liked that sort of thing."

I smiled, and laid an arm across my stomach, wincing at the slight cramp still there, and said "I do. Wow. One other thing, Aaden, how did you mask P'nyssa's scent?"

P'nyssa answered. "A little perfume, a little misdirection, a little hardware. It wasn't hard."

"Oh." They weren't going to tell me. That's okay; it worked. "How did you get P'nyssa past Rick? As far as I know, she's the first female to ever get into The Underground."

"Ken," Aaden answered. The fact that he called me by my first name surprised me. "Nobody is ever going to argue with an Uncia and Shardik's roommate. Not even an AI."

I smiled. It's nice to have friends like that.